again, my feeling is here. strong one. i just can't take it when i treat people sincerely and they always doubt about me. maybe i'm being too emotional, as one of my colleagues told me, when comes to work, don't talk about friend. does this mean that when we work we don't need to care about others? teach me to treat others bad. teach me... i'm not expecting any return when i treat you nice, but at least, care about my feeling. perhaps i put my hope high. no matter how, work is still back to work.
---------------------------------------------------------------
again, the colleague once said, that's the reality. when people need you, they'll treat you nicely as you're an angel. so i should conclude that, when they don't, you'll be dumped. don't take me wrongly. i'm not a negative thinker. it is caused by the environment. in fact, it's the reality i should say.
when i've decided to tender, many things happen to stop me. mayb i shouldn't say it would stop me, but it made me feel bad because my boss treats me well. i know i'll be getting more responsibilities. but why now? why put such a high hope on me? that i'll be watching two departments? i really don't wish to have conflict but i should expect it when a department has two heads. even i don't have the intention, doesn't mean the other party doesn't. the management expect me to accept their new task. they just assumed that everything supposed to be like this, this made me feel bad. like i'm very bad, when they need me, i chose to leave. what should i do? how to protect myself? i just don't want to be treated as a doll. wherever needs me, i will be allocated there. i don't even have a chance to decide for myself? or i'm just too soft... they assumed i'm alright with whatever they planned.
i know all these can be avoided if i'm standing strong. i'm learning... i'm...
*Lv*
-hoping for a day without any clouds-
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Saturday, January 23, 2010
complicated feeling
sigh, facing some hardship in my career path.. i don't know how to describe my feeling. i just know that the feeling is complicated.
not that i wish to continue working here, just that i don't really like the politics and racism happen at office nowadays; *why? why must make it so complicated? i just wanted everything to go simple. i ain't a threat for her! stop that thinking please! she's making herself behaving silly and end up it disturbs me!*
on the other hand, not that i'm not willing to help them, just that i don't really interested in that.
perhaps it's really difficult for us to get a job which we're fully interested and everthing goes simple. nothing is perfect right?
previously, i don't know what i like and feel lost for my future. and now, i thought of after leaving this company, i would go and try something new that i think i should be quite interested in those industry, but here come the issues.
she told me that the opportunity is finally here, she asked me to learn hard, for sure i'll suceed in one day and get what i want, and i'll be keep an eye for two departments, definitely my knowledge can be widen.
*why now? why not earlier? why is this happen after i've ready with my letter? what's next? what will happen after another party comes back?*
on the other hand, they want me to go in and learn and eventually take over the business.
*why now? why so sudden? i never thought about this although she mentioned about it before, but this time, she's so serious about it, and he's awaiting for it. i supposed that it's even harder than i work for others because i really don't have any idea on how to communicate with the two men.*
i've advice fromm dear bear but the feeling just can't go away. maybe the cloud is too big and heavy and it might takes few days before i could clear my mind. one thing i should be glad is i become 'hot item' suddenly ^^
*Lv*
not that i wish to continue working here, just that i don't really like the politics and racism happen at office nowadays; *why? why must make it so complicated? i just wanted everything to go simple. i ain't a threat for her! stop that thinking please! she's making herself behaving silly and end up it disturbs me!*
on the other hand, not that i'm not willing to help them, just that i don't really interested in that.
perhaps it's really difficult for us to get a job which we're fully interested and everthing goes simple. nothing is perfect right?
previously, i don't know what i like and feel lost for my future. and now, i thought of after leaving this company, i would go and try something new that i think i should be quite interested in those industry, but here come the issues.
she told me that the opportunity is finally here, she asked me to learn hard, for sure i'll suceed in one day and get what i want, and i'll be keep an eye for two departments, definitely my knowledge can be widen.
*why now? why not earlier? why is this happen after i've ready with my letter? what's next? what will happen after another party comes back?*
on the other hand, they want me to go in and learn and eventually take over the business.
*why now? why so sudden? i never thought about this although she mentioned about it before, but this time, she's so serious about it, and he's awaiting for it. i supposed that it's even harder than i work for others because i really don't have any idea on how to communicate with the two men.*
i've advice fromm dear bear but the feeling just can't go away. maybe the cloud is too big and heavy and it might takes few days before i could clear my mind. one thing i should be glad is i become 'hot item' suddenly ^^
*Lv*
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
My 1st Coach..
whoops, seems like i'm slightly late. supposed to be here right after our Pangkor trip but due to laziness... erm... so... :p
i leave the Pangkor trip to another main character to blog bout it whereas im here to blog bout my 1st Coach.. nyiek nyiek nyiek~~~
an extraordinary way of receiving present this time round, i guess you guys should have never tried before. you'll only view the pic before you get to see the real item ^^ in fact the item arrive later than the date it should be, but i supposed it's another way of surprise?? :p
as i've mentioned, i could only see the pic of the item on 31st Dec which is our 3rd anniversary. it surprised me actually.. see, how creative is my bear nowadays, he's trying to improve to be better and better. he felt so embarrassed when i look at him with some sort of sight that *arh?? what's that? what's happening??* then he explained, "i'm really sorry about this, the present can't arrive on time." then i was.... "orhhh, you very funny lor~~~ showing me pic pulak ^^ " felt sweet when see his cute look, feel his effort during preparation. not a problem even the present appeared later.
few days later after we back to KL, aha.... finally i got the real item. he has choosen a nice one!! like it so much!! thanks darl for buying me such expensive bag. appreciate lots. will ayang ayang the bag all the time.
dang dang~~~~ here it is!!! woohoo~~
-hope darl enjoy the pressie i gave him as well-
*Lv*
i leave the Pangkor trip to another main character to blog bout it whereas im here to blog bout my 1st Coach.. nyiek nyiek nyiek~~~
an extraordinary way of receiving present this time round, i guess you guys should have never tried before. you'll only view the pic before you get to see the real item ^^ in fact the item arrive later than the date it should be, but i supposed it's another way of surprise?? :p
as i've mentioned, i could only see the pic of the item on 31st Dec which is our 3rd anniversary. it surprised me actually.. see, how creative is my bear nowadays, he's trying to improve to be better and better. he felt so embarrassed when i look at him with some sort of sight that *arh?? what's that? what's happening??* then he explained, "i'm really sorry about this, the present can't arrive on time." then i was.... "orhhh, you very funny lor~~~ showing me pic pulak ^^ " felt sweet when see his cute look, feel his effort during preparation. not a problem even the present appeared later.
few days later after we back to KL, aha.... finally i got the real item. he has choosen a nice one!! like it so much!! thanks darl for buying me such expensive bag. appreciate lots. will ayang ayang the bag all the time.
dang dang~~~~ here it is!!! woohoo~~
-hope darl enjoy the pressie i gave him as well-
*Lv*
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